Disney 2025: Mea Culpa.

Forgive me, for I have sinned:  I nicked a set of the 3D glasses from Disneyland's Star Tours ride.  To be honest, I don't feel excessive guilt, I suspect that Disney has them produced by the millions and as such can spare a set or two, but I also suspect that they don't encourage people to view them as free souvenirs.

 - Sid

P.S. Okay, fine, I pocketed a set from the Webslingers ride too - because red frames!

Update: I have to say that I'm a bit disappointed to discover that people are selling these glasses for $40 CAD on eBay.  My innocent desire for a remembrance of Disneyland happiness is one thing, but fencing them online seems calculated and criminal.

Disney 2025: Main Street, Mars.

"For those of us who remember the carefree time it recreates, Main Street will bring back happy memories. For younger visitors, it is an adventure in turning back the calendar to the days of their grandfather's youth."

Walt Disney

Around the rocket in four directions spread the little town, green and motionless in the Martian spring. There were white houses and red brick ones, and tall elm trees blowing in the wind, and tall maples and horse chestnuts. And church steeples with golden bells silent in them.

Ray Bradbury, The Martian Chronicles

Disneyland's Main Street and its idealized Americana always disturbs me a little bit. When Walt Disney was originally designing the park in the early 1950s, he was inspired by his childhood home near Marceline in Missouri, as well as Disney set designer and artist Harper Goff's Colorado hometown of Fort Collins.

However, 70 years after the park's opening in 1955, Main Street's anachronistic turn of the millennium facade doesn't necessarily evoke a carefree time in the same way.  

Part of my disquiet is because it reminds me of April 2000: THE THIRD EXPEDITION*, one of the stories in Ray Bradbury's magnum opus, The Martian Chronicles.  The Third Expedition to Mars successfully lands on the Red Planet, only to discover that the nearby community is a perfect evocation of early 20th Century America, an impossible dream composed of wind-up phonographs, ice-cold lemonade, porch swings, fresh-mown grass and white picket fences, inhabited by the crew's beloved long lost relatives and childhood friends. Astonished and overjoyed, the crew abandons their ship to celebrate with their families and friends. 

Later, lying in bed in the room he shares with his brother in his parent's house, the ship's captain begins to suspect that something is horribly, horribly wrong:

And here we all are tonight, in various houses, in various beds, with no weapons to protect us, and the rocket lies in the moonlight, empty. And wouldn’t it be horrible and terrifying to discover that all of this was part of some great clever plan by the Martians to divide and conquer us, and kill us? Sometime during the night, perhaps, my brother here on this bed will change form, melt, shift, and become another thing, a terrible thing, a Martian. It would be very simple for him just to turn over in bed and put a knife into my heart. And in all those other houses down the street, a dozen other brothers or fathers suddenly melting away and taking knives and doing things to the unsuspecting, sleeping men of Earth ...

His hands were shaking under the covers. His body was cold. Suddenly it was not a theory. Suddenly he was very afraid. 

And when the captain finally tries to act on his suspicions and flee?  He never makes it to the door...

- Sid 

* Titled Mars is Heaven in its original standalone Planet Stories magazine publication in 1948.

Disney 2025: "That's no moon."

As I've discussed previously, Galaxy's Edge is my favourite part of Disneyland, but sadly, I have some mild concerns regarding Black Spire's longevity.  Outside of its immersive environment, Galaxy's Edge has only two ride options:  Smugglers Run and Rise of the Resistance. Rise has certainly remained a popular ride since its Disneyland debut in January of 2020, with wait times frequently reaching 90 to 120 minutes.  However, during our 2025 visit, wait times for Smugglers Run rarely rose above five minutes, and I've heard rumours that the local Disney community in Anaheim is a bit done with the ride.

However, I think that there's an opportunity for Smugglers Run to undergo a revival that would be both economically practical by preserving as much of the current infrastructure as possible, but newly exciting for visitors at the same time.

I realize that Galaxy's Edge is set in a very specific time period between The Last Jedi and The Rise of Skywalker, but what if Disney shifted Smugglers Run back in time to the timeline of A New Hope, when we're first introduced to the Falcon?  Instead of doing a cargo raid for the Resistance, you take flight from Mos Eisley after a confrontation with Jabba the Hutt and Boba Fett. You evade pursuit by an Imperial Star Destroyer, only to discover that the gigantic sphere in front of you is not a moon...

Briefly pulled aboard the Death Star by tractor beams, you manage to successfully break their hold, escape the hangar, and hyperspace to Yavin 4.  Once there, you leave the Falcon, receive a dramatic and emotional briefing from Princess Leia, then board a battered X-wing fighter and head back into space.  

There's an acrobatic dogfight with TIE fighters, you fly your ship into the Death Star's equatorial trench, follow Obi-Wan Kenobi's guidance to launch missiles that destroy the battlestation's reactor, and make a triumphant flight back to the rebel base - the end. 

The good news is that the existing infrastructure from Smugglers Run remains intact: new animatronics of Jabba the Hutt and Boba Fett replace Hondo Ohnaka at the beginning of the ride, and an updated simulation has to be created for the Falcon, but really, that's it for the existing front end.  Then, all you need is a conveniently located exit into the newly constructed Rebel base on Yavin 4, which contains a large hangar full of X-Wings, and a flight simulator motion-platform program, none of which would be a challenge for current state-of-the art - and voilà, Smugglers Run is now The Battle of Yavin 4. They would need to figure out some kind of safe and simple gangway system for quick access and egress for the X-Wings, but that's a minor issue.

After formulating the above plan, it occurs to me that the climactic events of The Force Awakens aren't all that different from A New Hope, and it's a lot closer to the existing Galaxy's Edge timeline - it would be just as easy (or hard) to recreate the destruction of Starkiller Base instead of the battle of Yavin-4.  Well, who cares, say I.  If you ask me, the Death Star battle is iconic, and, no offense to Oscar Isaac, but I'd much rather be Luke Skywalker than Poe Dameron.

- Sid 

Disney 2025: A Love Letter to Galaxy's Edge.

It's probably not a surprise that my favourite part of Disneyland is Galaxy's Edge - after all, I'm a science fiction fan. But there's more to it than that - every time we visit the park, I fall in love with Black Spire Outpost yet again, thanks to its unmatched ability to take me away to a different time and place.

Fantasyland, Adventureland, Frontierland and Tomorrowland are all conceptual umbrellas for a wide range of source material, which prevents them from being too specific in their overall look. For example, Adventureland hosts attractions based on Indiana Jones and Tarzan, along with the Jungle Cruise, none of which have any connection outside of their shared location, and as such it has to be somewhat generic in its style.

 

 

Galaxy's Edge doesn't have to compromise -  and the result is brilliant.  Radiator Springs runs a close second, but there's nothing that really ties together its storefront elements, whereas Black Spire is a perfectly conceived community from the Star Wars universe, with every part designed and decorated so as to completely evoke the feeling of being in an alien locale in a galaxy far, far away. 

 

 

The outpost's buildings*, archways and storefronts share an aged, distressed aesthetic, marked with the occasional pitted memory of a blaster bolt impact, whereas the port buildings surrounding the central plaza have a more formal, industrial look and feel.  

 

 

 

The attention to detail is impressive and effective. Set decorators for the first Star Wars movie referred to the props used for layering and detailing of the film's sets as greebly dressing, and Black Spire Outpost beautifully maintains and extends that original design philosophy throughout the venue.

 

 

Even the bathrooms have a rough and ready outpost vibe.

To add to the illusion, Smugglers Run and Rise of the Resistance both cleverly extend Black Spire's reality with storylines that logically transport guests away from the outpost's location on Batuu for adventures in space, and then returning them to the surface as part of each ride's continuity.** 

 

I have no idea what lies behind the various facades in Black Spire - logic says that there would be real-world storage spaces, dressing rooms for cast members, coffee rooms and lockers, meeting rooms and so on, but in my hopeful imagination all the backstage spaces maintain the Star Wars look and feel from the exteriors. How great would it be to work in an office space that looked like it belonged to Han Solo?

- Sid

* The building in the above photo is a nod to the colony's Disneyland home - the two circles and the beaklike canopy are an abstracted portrait of Donald Duck.

** The strange thing about Radiator Springs is that you walk through the town to get to Radiator Springs Racers, which then duplicates many of the town's landmarks within the ride itself. 

Disney 2025: "You insult my honour!"

"And believe me, I have very little honour to insult."

Hondo Ohnaka, Smugglers Run

 - Sid 

Disney 2024: Kuqqa Kulaa?

My previous posting told a slight lie. I did in fact purchase another souvenir item during our time at Disneyland - I finally succumbed to temptation and invested in the Black Spire outpost version of a Coke.  Hmmm...I wonder how much it costs Disney to have the Coca-Cola Company manufacture a custom product which is presumably only for sale at two refreshment carts on opposite sides of the United States?

- Sid

Disney 2024: "I am no Jedi."

No light sabers this trip, no helmets (although I noticed that there was now an alternate version of the X-Wing pilot's helmet that I purchased on our last Disneyland visit for sale) - my only souvenir shopping was the impulse buy of an Ahsoka t-shirt from a vendor located in one of the underpass tunnels that lead to Galaxy's Edge. 

I hate to say it, but after watching the Ahsoka series on Disney+ that provided the graphics for the t-shirt, I found myself siding with Team Ashley regarding the casting for the titular character.  

No offense to Rosario Dawson's performance, but after you've painted someone orange, stencilled marks on their face, and covered their hair with montrals and striped lekku*, their voice suddenly becomes a strong point in the character's presentation. In this case, Ashley Eckstein's extended run as Ahsoka's voice in the Clone Wars and Star Wars: Rebels series would have cemented the connection in the character's transition to live action, much as with Mark Hamill and Kevin Conroy's move from the animated Batman series to video games.  

And who knows, she might not have been so grim all the time - I know that Ahsoka's history weighs her down, but I also think of the adult version of the character in Rebels as having achieved some emotional balance, although perhaps through the Force rather than weekly counselling sessions.

- Sid

* In case you'd been wondering what the horns and fleshy head-tails were called.  (Never forget, in the Star Wars Universe, EVERYTHING has a name.)  

Disney 2024: Games Without Frontiers.

As you get older, it's harder to really play, or at least play publicly in the way that children do. A lot of that desire gets sublimated into activities with a sort of grown-up veneer of acceptability: cosplay, paintball, tabletop and video gaming, D&D, LARPing, and all the other loopholes that allow us to say "let's pretend" as adults.

For a lot of people, Disneyland is that urge to play writ large, and for me, Galaxy's Edge is the perfect venue to fully experience that. It's a testament to the detail and consistency that Disney's creative people have put into this little alien outpost so that, when I'm there, I feel like I'm actually on another planet, even when surrounded by people in mouse ears and sweat pants. 

Part of me wants to explore Galaxy's Edge all on my own, because it would leave me free to enjoy it as if I were part of that world, to quote Ariel. As it is, Karli sometimes worries that I’m not having fun when I'm there, whereas the joke is that I couldn't be enjoying myself more.  However, being a dangerous rebel who could be in a life-or-death confrontation with storm troopers at any moment tends to make me look a bit grim - after all, we're not playing around here, this is serious stuff.

Smugglers Run is another good example.  I tolerate the lines and waiting and so on in order to get to where I want to be, but when I sit down at the controls of the Millennium Falcon, I'm not having a simulated experience, I'm flying a starship. As such, when the controls prompt me to perform an action such as take off, go to hyperspace, or steer the ship through an asteroid field, I do it with a certitude, confidence, and gravitas that's appropriate to what I'm doing.

And, hopefully, with a certain degree of style - after all, even if you're just playing at being the Falcon's pilot, you're still playing in the big leagues.

- Sid

P.S. Welcome to the future - the boots and background alien heads in the above photo were created by the Photoshop AI. However, the AI won't accept certain prompts, so I had to do the gun belt and weapon the old-fashioned way.

Disney 2024: Ridin' dirty.

 

Maybe not the perfect ride for a rainy day on Batuu (or in Anaheim), but I like it.

- Sid

Disney 2024: Silver Lining.

For Karli's 50th birthday this year, she decided that there was no place she would rather go than Disneyland. Planning was simple - Karli has become a seasoned veteran in terms of Disney visits - and we invited Karli's best friend John and her sister Stefanie to join us.  John had never been to Disneyland, so he was eager to take advantage of our collective experience to introduce him to the park.

We had all been checking the forecasts for the weather during our upcoming visit, but it was only when I took a look at CNN the day before we left that I discovered that California was currently in the midst of the most serious storm that it had experienced for quite a long time. Record-breaking rains closed airports and caused flooding and mudslides, there had been four fatalities, and a state of emergency had been declared in Los Angeles and seven of the surrounded counties.  Even more ominously, Disneyland had experienced closures due to the emergency.  Obviously not an ideal time for travel, but it was too late to cancel, so we decided to carry on and hope for the best. 

Surprisingly, we experienced no delays as a result of the chaotic weather conditions.  Our flight left on time and landed without any problems, our Uber seamlessly delivered us to our Disney-adjacent hotel, and Disneyland was scheduled to be open over the course of our three-day passes (although rain was on the forecast for the first day and part of the second day).

Fortunately, Karli had the foresight to purchase rain ponchos for the group just in case, which turned out to be the ideal garment for the weather.

As forecast, rain was definitely the theme for our first day at the park - not quite torrential, but certainly a steady solid downpour.

The result?  Limited attendance at the park, and far shorter lines than the norm. 

We all got a bit wet - even the best rain gear will only keep you so dry over the course of a full day - and we obviously couldn't go on any outdoor rides, but we were generally comfortable, and the lack of crowds allowed us to visit favourite rides like Smugglers Run and Indian Jones multiple times.

It was one of those rare occasions when clouds actually had a silver lining.

- Sid