Oh, and did I mention that Jaws isn't science fiction?

Dear Space Channel:

Treasure Island is not a fantasy story.  The presence of pirates may add interest to a tale, but pirates per se are not part of the fantasy genre, in spite of what the Walt Disney Company™ and Captain Jack Sparrow would have you believe.  Therefore, fond though we are of Eddie Izzard, there is not one reason in the world for you to be showing the two-part British adaptation of Treasure Island.  Yes, Elijah Wood makes an appearance, but he does not play a hobbit - therefore, as with Mr. Izzard, as much as we may like Elijah Wood, that still doesn't make this a fantasy movie.

If you would like a list of more appropriate genre material for broadcast purposes, I refer you to my July 8th, 2007 letter regarding Dead Calm.

Sincerely yours,

Sid